Greetings, listeners. It is I, Count Vacula's Great-uncle Vacstradamus. Also known as Gruncle Vaxie. Isn't that amusing?

You know what else is amusing?

No, I am asking you. Please tell me.

Today, my young friends, I welcome you to “Gruncle Vaxie’s Grown-Up Corner.” Do not worry. This is not an episode for grown-ups. This is an episode about grown-ups.

Poor grown-ups. Poor, poor grown-ups. Their lives are very hard. They work boring jobs. They never get to play tag. And they have hardly any stickers.

It is very easy to forget how much your grown-up could use some kindness. But today I will share with you some of the terrible things that grown-ups have to endure, and when the episode is over, perhaps you will feel like giving your grown-up a hug.

You can also tell them, "I am very sorry that a creeping awareness of the purposelessness of the universe haunts your waking hours." But maybe just a hug would be best.

Well, children. That is all. I have enjoyed speaking with you today. In fact, I enjoyed it so much that I even considered smiling. I look forward to considering smiling with you again. Until then, please remember to be kind and take good care of your grown-up. If you want, you could even give them a sticker.

Your acquaintance,

Gruncle Vaxie

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